Season 1, Episode 9

The Skinny: In which the “skinny” is, in fact, kind of a big fat spoiler that I can’t even ruin way up top here. And so I avoid it like whoa and direct you to the recap below. But guys, I’ll tell you this: If you thought Team Avatar getting arrested and then Korra finding out that Tarrlok is a blood bender right before she gets forcibly removed from Republic City was dramatic, THIS ep was out of control. Also, several of my theories from last week ACTUALLY came true this ep. HOLLA! 

Guys, lookit! HE HAS HAIR OF SNAKES.

The Setup: GUYS. SO many things happened last week. Some of them involved Mako, Bolin, and Hoe Cake getting arrested. Some of them involved said trio moving onto Air Temple Island, where Tenzin’s kids promptly flashed their AWESOME. Some of them involved Tarrlok being a shady ass. Some of them involved Korra feeling bummed about her lack of progress in learning her airbending. One of them even involved Mako and Korra having a teensy flirty moment in the car. But the THING that happened last week mostly involved Korra and Tarrlok, who finally laid all the cards on the table and fought each other, a battle that has been brewing, if not for the whole season, then at least the last few eps. Accordingly, their showdown was EPIC, and ended with a revelation about Tarrlok: He’s a MOTHER-CUSSING BLOOD BENDER, who can use his “gift” without a full moon. Which is exactly what he did to Korra when he crippled her with his EVIL for “getting in the way” and threw her in the back of a car and out of town. GUYS. He told the Avatar–the AVATAR!–that she would never see Republic City again. This afer he threw her friends in jail, and is slowly but surely chipping away at Tenzin’s power on the council. THIS GUY. I should have known. He has three ponytails. If that’s not a sure sign of evil…

The Breakdown: So the intro reminds us that–GASP!–the Avatar has been abducted! And basically goes on to describe the battle royale between Korra and Tarrlok, blood bender, sneaky bastard, and all-around meanie. UGH. Still can’t believe how awful he is, except for the times that I TOTALLY ALWAYS KNEW HE WAS BAD. 

So we open in a dingy basement, where Korra is being bloodbended down the stairs by Tarrlok. IT IS CREEPY TO THE MAX, and is not made any better when he locks her in a BOX, yo. Not a room, not a cell. A freaking steel box that’s barely bigger than a casket. As Korra is screaming her head off, Tarrlok leaves, and it’s revealed where he has hidden our girl: In an isolated shack waaaay up in the snowy mountains. Dang, guys. He is taking no chances. 

Back on Air Temple Island, Tenzin, Pema, and Meelo are sleeping in the same bed. HA! Kids. The phone rings, and Meelo goes to answer it and give the caller the WHAT FOR, reminding said caller–with attitude–that it’s 6 in the morning and this better be GOOD. He’s so hilarious, guys. Tenzin takes the phone and it’s obvious that he’s just heard the news: Korra is gone. BOOM.

BUT. Notice that I didn’t say kidnapped. That’s because Tarrlok is spinning the web of LIES, friends, and plays the victim when Tenzin goes to city hall, where a crime scene photographer is taking pictures of the aftermath of Korra v Tarrlok. Tarrlok is looking weary and fake-innocent while receiving treatment for his wounds. He tells Tenzin how Korra came to him last night to talk about why he arrested her friends. True enough. BUT THEN he takes a sharp left to Liarville and says that EQUALISTS attacked them, he was electrocuted by one of those gloves, and that the EQUALISTS TOOK KORRA after he was knocked out. I CALL SHENANIGANS. But Tenzin believes him, and so does everyone else.

But look at who we have here, just hearing the news and GEARING UP: Beifong, I think still recovering from the battle with Mr. Sato. She goes to bust Hoe Cake, Mako, and Bolin out of jail so that they can help her find Korra and her missing metal benders, who were kidnapped a couple weeks back. Of course, VOM, Mako and Hoe Cake kiss when they see each other. AWKWARD! But then Beifong tells them that Amon kidnapped Korra, and they need to go find her. Guys, Mako is so instantly worried and anxious that if I was Hoe Cake I’d be like, “Now I see,” you know? Don’t worry, though. Beifong brings the funny by HILARIOUSLY using her metal bending to fix Bolin’s fly for him. SERIOUS LOL, guys. 

Meanwhile, Korra is still trapped in her steel box, and with all of this time she’s got now, she thinks back on Tenzin’s urge to meditate. So she does. And WHOA. She has another vision of Aang where he and Toph Beifong (Lin’s mom) are talking about an out-of-the ordinary criminal, and they go to arrest a baddie, Yakone. Who kind of looks like Tarrlok to me. He seems like a mobster or something, and he runs his mouth the whole time he’s being arrested. Hmmm…

IRL, Team Beifong goes to Tenzin and they all round up and figure out a place to start looking for Korra down some backstreets of Republic City. Beifong does her metalbender X-ray magic and discovers a tunnel underground. They all are still totally unaware that Tarrlok has told everyone a lie about what happened to Korra, and that they are looking for her in the wrong place. They’re still looking for the Equalists and Amon, not realizing the real bad guy is feeding them some quality BS that only serves HIS anti-equalist vendetta. 

So, underground, Team Beifong starts the arduous process of checking the tunnels for some sign of…something. Hoe Cake takes this opportunity to ask Bolin if Mako is ok. He seems really concerned about Korra (FIST PUMP!), she says, and she’s worried about him. She asks Bolin if he thinks Mako likes Korra as more than a friend. Bolin oversells his denial, guys, as he has a tendency to do, and she knows it. Hoe Cake tells him to tell the truth. He does and mentions the kiss Korra and Mako shared. Bolin tries to assure her that it was nothing, but of all the things Hoe Cake may be, let’s be serious: she’s actually awesome. Friendly, generous, fun, brave, and SMART. She knows the kiss was SOMETHING.

This is solely for the purposes of refreshing everyone’s minds….And also to say MOAR OF THIS PLEASE.

Any brooding that might happen is instantly put on hold, though, when some motorcycles enter the tunnel. Team Beifong hides as the motorcycles go through a door in the wall. Beifong against shows her true badass colors by opening the door with her mad skillz. What they find is basically a chi-blocker/equalist garage/transportation center. They over hear some chi-blockers talking about a prison, and figure that Korra is being held there. 

When they arrive, Beifong finds her officers, who have already lost their bending, but when Mako asks her about Korra, she says she doesn’t see her. He FLIPS on a guard there and asks where the Avatar is. Mako is about fire bend the guard when he–the guard–tells them that the Avatar isn’t here, and that Equalists didn’t attack City Hall. Tarrlok is LYING. Team Beifong FINALLY realizes that Tarrlok has taken Korra, but not before the alarms in the prison go off, and SHIZZ GOES DOWN. Chi-blockers v Team Beifong on moving train tracks. Beifong saves the day, though. 

UGH, guys. This box Korra’s in must SUCK. At least she’s meditating some more, and has another vision of Aang and Yakone, this time at a trial. Turns out Yakone has been ruling the underworld of Republic City with an illegal gift: Blood bending, which he can do at will. His lawyer spins the truth and seems to be making a good case for Yakone. But the council still finds him guilty, and sentences Yakone to life in prison. AND THEN. Guys, HE BLOODBENDS EVERYONE in the courtroom. Even Aang. Vision over. Scary, yo. 

Team Beifong goes to City Hall to confront Tarrlok. He’s all, “Y’all crazy!” until his aide tells them the truth: She saw Tarrlok put Korra in the back of that car and send her away. THEN SHE THROWS HIM UNDER THE BUS and reveals that he’s a blood bender. Team Beifong tries to take him down and find out where he’s taken Korra, but he blood bends them all until they pass out and runs away. Guys, he basically does the same thing that Yakone had done in the courtroom in Korra’s vision of Aang. WTF CUT YOUR EVIL HAIR. 

Afer they come to, they realize that Tarlok blood bended them all. The new CoP seems to be coming around to the good side and sends the force after Tarrlok, while Team Beifong decides to try and go after him themselves. 

Back to Korra’s vision: Yakone is still blood bending the courtroom and uses his skills to escape. Aang tells him that he won’t get away with this, and Yakone says that Republic City is HIS, and that he’ll be back one day to claim it again. Then runs away. 

Aang goes all Avatar state on his retreating ass and TAKES HIM THE EFF DOWN. Yakone tries to kill Aang with his blood bending, but CAN’T because Aang goes Avatar state AGAIN and takes away Yakone’s bending. FOR GOOD. Whew. 

Back to the dingy basement. Korra and Tarrlok have a chat. Tarrlok’s all pissed that his perfect plan–to rule Republic City like his daddy, Yakone, could not–was ruined by Korra. She tells him that it’s over, but he says, nuh uh. He’s going to run away and start anew, and Korra is going to be his hostage. As he’s leaving, he comes to the top of the stairs and sees…

MOTHER CUSSING AMON. WWWTTTTFFFF!!!!!

Korra hears that Amon is upstairs and understandably looks FREAKED. Meanwhile, Amon tells Tarrlok that it’s time for him to be “equalized.” Tarrlok, being his arrogant self, tells Amon that he’ll NEVER equalize him. Tarrlok blood bends the chi-blockers, who go down right away. But Amon is able to resist it, guys. WHO THE EFF IS THIS GUY?! Tarrlok is ALSO freaked out and asks Amon, “What are you?” “I am the solution,” Amon says. @&*%@! THEN, he TAKES TARRLOK’S BENDING AWAY, and, frankly, Tarrlok looks dead. 

But then, DANGER! Amon tells his revived chi-blockers to go get the Avatar, and to electrocute the box to knock her out first. Freaking Tarrlok, putting her in a metal box. They go down to the basement, but Korra is SO FREAKING SMART, guys, and uses her cloth cuffs to block herself from touching the box as they electrocute it. She fakes them out like a PRO. Like the EFFING AVATAR. Of course, she gets away from them. 

Outside, she sees Amon putting Tarrlok in the back of a car. They have a staring contest. Korra does some water/ice-bending, and runs off. Amon chases her, but she gets away by bend-skiing down the snowy mountain. And then! JOY!!! NAGA FINDS KORRA and brings her back home. Naga is, no question, the most awesome pet there ever was. 

As everyone’s badgering Korra with questions, Mako pushes them all out of the way, picks Korra up in his arms, and carries her to Appa. He tells her that he was so worried about her. She says that she’s glad he’s there. As he’s setting her down, he tells her that she’s safe now, and touches her face. CARESSES IT, guys. Hoe Cake looks heartbroken, and while I was giddy and excited at the Makorra sweetness, I felt bad for her. 

The only time Mako smiled this WHOLE EP…

…was while he was doing THIS. I MEAN…

The Last Word: I totally thought that the baddie in Korra’s visions would be Tarrlok’s dad. And I TOTALLY called the way Mako would react to hearing about Korra’s abduction. But guys, I don’t even really care. Because even though I wound up puzzling things out ahead of time, I was still breathless watching. The ACTION is awesome right now.

Also, TWO WEEKS FROM NOW IS THE SEASON FINALE, GUYS. IT IS THE SHOWDOWN. KORRA. AMON. The only time they’ve ever shown a preview, and it looked OUTSTANDING. Although there is still another episode next week, so it could have been a taste of everything left. But still. *bites nails* I CANNOT WAIT. 

I can’t even process questions right now. Please, talk amongst yourselves. 

Season 1, Episode 8

The Skinny: Last week, Hoe Cake’s dad was revealed to be a big bad guy Equalist. Mako and Bolin moved in with Hoe Cake for a brief, glorious time when Bolin took hilarious advantage of the pool and servants. The aftermath of arresting Mr. Sato left Beifong’s job hanging in the balance, and Korra is about to be dealing with an AWKWARD living situation involving her crush and his gf living in her house. Korra is still struggling with her airbending, which does not exist, and she continues her absence from Tarrlok’s task force. (GUYS. I just discovered that I was spelling his name wrong. GASP! Apologies to you. But NOT TO HIM.)

The Setup: In keeping with this new trend of bringing the escalated DRAMZ with each new episode, last week’s Korra finally revealed the manufacturer of those insane chi-blocker/electroshock gloves and YO, it was EXACTLY who I suspected: Hoe Cake’s dad. Turns out that he’s been nursing some serious bender hate ever since a fire bender murdered his wife, so he’s all “AMON 4 PREZ” because he thinks that benders need to go the way of the dodo. But let’s back up, because the setup for the showdown where all is revealed was pretty great, too. So Korra offers Mako and Bolin a place to live on Air Temple Island and is all excited, until it comes out that Hoe Cake has already offered Mako and Bolin a place to stay at HER house. This winds up being important because, while Korra is hanging out at The Estate, Beifong and Tenzin are investigating those pesky gloves. They think they found the guy, until Korra overhears Hoe Cake’s dad on a  suspicious phone call and runs to share the news with them. At this point, SHIZZ GETS REAL, as Beifong, Tenzin, and Korra investigate Mr. Sato, much to the anger of Mako and Hoe Cake. At first, it seemed like the phone call was a red herring. BUT THEN. A new tip leads them to The Estate, where an underground factory is discovered, CHOCK FULL of those gloves and some insane chi-blocker robot things. Mr. Sato shows up and a BATTLE ENSUES, wherein Beifong, Tenzin, Korra, and a bunch of Beifong’s metal benders are all knocked out or taken prisoner before Mako and Bolin come to save the day. Except the hero winds up being Hoe Cake, who is discovers her father is CRAY and evil, and knocks him out. Episode ends with everyone headed to live on Air Temple Island with Korra. ONTO THE NEXT ONE, FOLKS. 

The Breakdown: After a week off, Korra is FINALLY new again! Let’s dive right into “When Extremes Meet”, or “The Unending Major SUCKAGE of the Weasel-Snake, Tarrlok.” The retro intro brings us up to speed on the chief of police job, which Beifong has vacated to go all rogue badass on Amon and tension between Equalists and benders is at a higher fever pitch…again.  The DRAMZ are forever. 

We start off with Korra and Tenzin’s kids–who got some AWESOME comic relief moments in this ep–welcoming Mako, Bolin, and Hoe Cake to their new home on Air Temple Island. Mako and Bolin are thankful, Hoe Cake is AMAZED at how much luggage the airbender acolytes can lift because, yo, her Louis Vuitton steamer trunks are HEAVY, guys.

This whole part is basically why Tenzin’s kids are hilarious. Meelo has an insta-crush on Hoe Cake and gets his kindergartner charm on. It’s kind of adorable. Jinora gives the new guys a breathless tour, which basically is a useless-information dump. BUT THEN Bolin brings the funny and asks her a BAZILLION ridiculous questions at the same speed she was just talking, hoping to stump her. Jinora knows her shizz, though. It’s basically HILARIOUS. Air Temple Island is like a big crazy family with all these weird, awesome kids living there.

It’s Ikki, though, who wins at “kids who put their feet in their mouths without knowing it to HILARIOUS ends” because she pretty much puts Korra’s crush on Mako ON BLAST, right to Hoe Cake’s face. Unannounced. Which led to Korra’s face doing THIS:

IKKI!! SHUT IT!!

After the introductions and settling in on Air Temple Island, Korra and Tenzin go to the swearing in of the new police chief, who is…NOT TARRLOK. I am confounded. Don’t worry, though, guys: Tarrlok–le SNAKE–has managed to bully his way into a position of power by getting the new Chief to consult him on all Equalist-related matters, which is pretty much all anyone cares about these days anyway, so Tarlock is basically the de facto CoP. BLERGH. UGHVOM. He really sucks so much. When Korra called him a weasel-snake, I was like “YES. BOTH OF THOSE.”

He smarms and makes icky while asking Korra to rejoin his task force and Korra is like, “Bish please! No. Effing. Way.” Korra basically plays the Avatar card, saying that she doesn’t need him, but he DOES need the Avatar. And then Tarrlok CUTS DEEP by telling Korra she isn’t the Avatar because she still can’t airbend. LOW BLOW, asshole. He was condescending, patronizing, and horrid, and leaves Korra on the verge of tears.

On their way home, Tenzin asks Korra if she’s ever made contact with her past lives, which brings up the couple of hallucinations/visions Korra’s had during times of epic distress. Tenzin and Korra aren’t sure what they mean, but they both think that it’s a clue to Korra learning more about the spiritual side of being an Avatar, and that the spirit of Aang is trying to reach out to Korra. Tenzin tells her to meditate on it.

“Korra, your sadness breaks my heart. PLEASE, let’s be happy TOGETHER.”

So back on the island, Korra’s off meditating/feeling low when Bolin, Mako, and Hoe Cake find her and she confesses her self-doubt to them. They all basically ROCK–yes, even Hoe Cake, who was pretty badass this ep–and pledged to help Korra learn what she needs to know and to help her fight the good fight because Aang didn’t fight the Fire nation by himself either. He had his friends. AWWW, tug the heartstrings! That is, until Meelo jumps into their feel-good sesh and FARTS ON THEM. A couple times. Guys, something about me: I have a five-year-old’s sense of humor about farts. I DIED when this happened. But the point of this scene: the formation of Team Avatar, who go cruising around in Hoe Cake’s bangin’ car, where they listen to police scanners, looking for wrongs to right and criminals to take down in Republic City. It’s like Batman times 4, with girls and minus the capes. So not really Batman at all, but still AWESOME.

Team Avatar hears about some escaped chi-blocker criminals and they get on the case, bending all up on the streets as Hoe Cake drives. Hoe Cake’s little chi-blocker/electrocution glove comes in pretty handy as Team Avatar takes down a GAGGLE of bad guys before Tarrlok shows up. While Tarrlok basically chides Korra for being in the way, she smartly points out that the whole time Team Avatar was fighting, she didn’t see the task force or the cops anywhere. HMMMMM….

This is the part when we get to the meat of the “unending suck of Tarrlok” portion of the show. He wants to pass a law that says Equalists = illegal. Also, he wants to enact a curfew for nonbenders. More proof that Tarlock is THE EPIC WORST. Tenzin is the only dissenter. The law passes. I blame the useless council members who sit on their asses without speaking at all. 

Back to Team Avatar: OOOOH, GUYS! Mako and Korra have a “thing” getting into the car to respond to a “riot” of Equalists. It’s cute and one of those things that’s in that weird space between superfriendly and a little flirty. Hoe Cake sees it in the rearview and gets squinty. *I* get heart palpitations of the AWESOME kind.

Anyway, Team Avatar gets to the scene to discover that the power is off because Tarrlok is a douche. He’s FURIOUS that Korra has shown up, getting in the way again. Then he arrests a whole bunch of nonbending citizens because he thinks they’re all Equalists, and a major riot ensues. In retaliation, he arrests Hoe Cake for being a nonbender out past curfew whose father is a known criminal. THEN he arrests Bolin and Mako, too, because he SUCKS. More threats and a paddywagon later, and Korra is all alone. Team Avatar’s brief run of awesome appears to be at an end.

Next day, Tenzin and Korra go to the police station to get the rest of the team released and the new CoP, who is a butt-kissing jerkface, tells them that no one can be released without Tarrlok’s approval, and that the task force isn’t done questioning them. Tenzin is awesome, but, in the end, ineffectual.

By now, our girl is basically FED THE EFF UP with Tarrlok and his bullying, so she sneaks out to go talk to him, and during their tense conversation, she finds out that he only arrested Mako, Bolin, and Hoe Cake to get to Korra and force her to get back on his task force. He’s been getting gradually more irritated and angry this whole ep that Korra not only refuses to rejoin the task force, but that she instead keeps “getting in the way,” which is his motto right now. Clearly, these two will not be wearing their BFF necklaces anymore.

AND THEN HOLY EFFING $&!@#%&!@!$ SHIZZBALLS. THEY DUEL AND IT IS BADASS AND KORRA ALMOST WINS AND THEN TARRLOK TURNS OUT TO BE A BLOOD BENDER (!!!!) WHO CAN BLOOD BEND WITHOUT A FULL MOON AND HE CRIPPLES KORRA, KNOCKS HER OUT, AND THEN PUTS HER IN THE BACK OF A CAR AND SENDS HER AWAY AND TELLS HER THAT SHE’LL NEVER SEE REPUBLIC CITY AGAIN. thupbpth *DIES*. I am dead. Or nearly dead. I AM CERTAINLY NOT CALM. 

This is my pissed face. And hair.

Also, Korra has another vision of Aang, but we’ll have to wait and see what comes of it. 

So, the tally: Mako? Jail. Bolin? Jail. Hoe Cake? Jail. All three now at the mercy of Tarrlok, who is sure to be extra shizzy to them because of Korra. Tenzin? Losing power on the council every day. Tarrlok? FREAKY, EVIL BASTARD who is gaining power every day, and whose motives are unknown but surely BAD. And Korra? Beaten, pissed, and on her way to exile in an unknown place, far away from her friends, her city, and her mother-cussing Naga. DANG.

The Last Word: My thoughts? Korra’s going to wind up with Beifong somewhere, going after Amon. She’s going to start learning the spiritual side of being the Avatar, as well as maybe doing a teensy bit of airbending. Basically, she’s going to WAR UP. Meanwhile, Mako, Bolin, and Hoe Cake will get out of jail and Mako will go CRAY that Korra has been kidnapped and will have laser focus on her. His worrying about Korra will give Hoe Cake some pause about their relationship, and will basically make Mako understand which one of the two he loves more. (OBVS Korra.) 

Guys, this show has been amping up the drama recently to epic levels, and I love it. Each of these last three eps has been off the charts excellent, with major plot advancement, crazy action, twists, tension, ALL of the things. And it’s all building up. If my research is correct, there are only 4 episodes left in this season of Book One, with the last two eps airing over a whole hour like the first two did. Legend of Korra is at a fever pitch right now, guys. I CAN’T EVEN DEAL AT ALL. I AM STILL NOT CALM.

The Lines: “Asami, did you know Korra likes Mako?” BAHHH!!!!! KIDS. I totally LOLed.

So, guys: Thoughts?! Where’s Korra going? Will we see Team Avatar united? WHAT THE EFF IS UP WITH TARRLOK?!?

Season 1, Episode 7

The Skinny: The title of this episode–“The Aftermath”–is pretty apropos. Because this ep is the FALLOUT, yo. Amon has destroyed the Pro Bending arena, Beifong was unable to protect the spectators from an attack by Freaky Face like she said she could, and the threat of war between the benders and the Equalists is at a fever pitch. ALL THE SHIZZ, folks. This episode haz it. 

The Setup: Last week, all of the things happened. Well, the Pro Bending final is mostly what happened. The Fire Ferrets were facing the defending champion Wolf Bats, lead by Tano, aka Hair Flip. There was mad cheating on the Bats’ part, the Ferrets couldn’t beat it, and they lost. BUT THEN! Amon showed up. He had been threatening to do just such a thing unless the Council canceled the bending final so that the people of Republic City would know how AWFUL they are for glorifying benders. Except Amon only said all that with the hopes that the Council would do the OPPOSITE, thus leaving the Pro Bending Final as the perfect platform for him to basically spew his manifesto: bending sucks, benders suck WORSE, Equalists rule figuratively and soon will LITERALLY, because a new government will soon be in place so that ALL THE BENDERS GO DOWN EVERYWHERE. Republic City AND the world. BOOM. Onto the next one, folks.  

The Breakdown: Our little intro features Tarlock, the bastard, who is totally bringing his sneakiness to bear on Beifong after Amon was able to attack everyone at the Pro Bending final, and is calling for her job while looking all serious and legit and wouldn’t you know it, PERFECT for the position that isn’t even open yet. He’s a dirty dog, friends. I don’t trust him as far as I can throw him, which is not at all. He’s too big. I don’t even think I could shove him to the ground, and I’m no dainty daisy. BLERGH.

 So, since the arena was basically destroyed in last week’s attacks, Bolin and Mako have nowhere to live now. Korra shows up all excited because Tenzin said that the two of them could come live on Air Bender Island with Korra. HOLLA, roomies!! Mako and Korra shacking up together! Excitement all around! Of course, though, everyone gets awkward because it turns out that Hoe Cake has beaten Korra to the punch and offered Mako and Bolin a place to stay at her daddy’s ginormous estate (henceforth “The Estate”) and they’re going to live there instead. Hoe Cake shows up and, as always, is MADDENINGLY nice to Korra. She invites Korra to come over the next day to hang out, Korra says, *VOM* Hell to the naw!, Pabu greases the skids, Korra caves to the cuteness and also Bolin’s hilarity and agrees to stop by, and everyone’s cool for now. But still, Hoe Cake 1, Korra 0. I SEETHE.

Next day, Korra shows up at The Estate, and everyone is chilling in the pool. WHY Mako decides to wear a bathing suit that features a SHIRT is beyond me. Unfortunately, everyone is, like, enjoying themselves. When everyone goes to the racetrack out back (I KNOW), Korra and Hoe Cake get in one of the cars together, and I was like, “THIS IS IT. Hoe Cake is going to TAKE KORRA DOWN like the bad guy she is.” Alas. I was wrong. Hoe Cake and Korra actually bond and it’s altogether sickening. 

Mako, PLEASE. Korra would never make you keep that shirt on.

High on friendliness or whatever, Korra goes to powder her nose in one of the bazillion bathrooms on The Estate, and overhears Daddy Hoe Cake talking on the phone about how “now is the time to strike” and stuff. Earlier in the ep, we saw Beifong searching for the manufacturers of those chi-blocker gloves, and discovering a TON of them in a factory owned by someone who turns out to be Daddy Hoe Cake’s business rival. OF COURSE, Korra hears this convo and jumps to the same conclusion that everyone probably did–that Sato is in league with the Equalists–and runs to tell Tenzin and Beifong, who totally jump on the bandwagon.

Of course, news of this investigation DOES NOT sit well with Mako and Hoe Cake. Hoe Cake is indignant while Beifong and her metal benders search her dad’s factory, and Mako flat out tells Korra that if she keeps up with hating on his lady’s dad, THEY will not be friends anymore. Way harsh, Mako. Because even though the orignal search turns up nothing, YO!! I thought for a second that the phone call Korra overheard would be a red herring AND THEN IT WASN’T. Hoe Cake’s daddy is totally allied with Amon. He is the ENEMY. 

Guys. This shady factory worker tells Korra, Tenzin, and Beifong that the reason they didn’t find anything at Sato’s factory is because he has a hidden one underneath The Estate. When everyone shows up there to look for it, Mako and Hoe Cake are all,”What are you doing?! There’s nothing here! You are all WRONG!” And Hoe Cake is like, “I think I would know if my dad had a hidden FACTORY under The Estate!” But Beifong uses her metal bender magic and x-rays the ground and finds a tunnel that leads to a huge cavern underground with banners of Freaky Face all over and chi-blocker gloves and these big chi-blocker robots. And then guys? All of the shizz hit the fan OVER AND OVER AND OVER. ALL THE SHIZZ. All of it. It was bananas. I love how I kind of had an idea that it would be coming and it was more awesome than I thought it would be.  

EPIC BATTLING ensues between Hoe Cake’s dad, who shows up and uses one of those robots to go after Korra, Tenzin, Beifong, and a bunch of other metal benders. Apparently, he holds a grudge against benders because a fire bender killed his wife many years ago. This fight is basically The Tenzin Show. I mean, everyone is awesome, but GET SOME TENZIN! I LOVED seeing him air bend. He was seriously outstanding. Well, until he, and everyone, was knocked out by crazy Sato’s chi-blocker robots. EVERYONE. Including Korra. EEP!

HIS EYES ARE GOLDEN OMFG

That’s when Mako and Bolin show up to save the day, even though Mako had totally called Korra a liar earlier and said that their friendship was over because she DARED to suspect Hoe Cake’s TOTALLY SUSPICIOUS dad. (It gave me the angry-sads when he chose Hoe Cake over Korra. Seriously, get Hoe Cake out of here already. She ruins everything.) They wise up and are just about ready to get away with Korra, Tenzin, and Beifong when Sato catches them. He’s just about to put the smack down on Mako and Bolin when Hoe Cake shows up and is pretty effing shocked at what she sees. Her father pleads with her to understand why he’s doing this and makes his case to get Hoe Cake to his side by offering her a chi-blocker glove. Just when you think that she’s going to take the glove and chi-block/electrocute Mako and Bolin, she uses her dad’s chi blocker glove to electrocute HIM instead and kick some ass of her own. I will call her by her name just this once in honor of her making a tough decision and going against her own father and finding out he was a lying evil scum and then having to kick his ass: Asami is a tough chickadee. I felt bad for her. Now, Mako. End the madness please and send her packing. She’ll land on her feet. 

So everyone runs off, but not before Hoe Cake’s dad makes off with some of Beifong’s metal bending cops. Yo, can I get a “what, what” for ROGUE BEIFONG? GET IT, girl. I can’t wait to see how badass she gets while going after her missing benders and Amon. I was clapping and fistpumping and yelling. Beifong is quickly becoming my favorite secondary character on this show. She’s so FIERCE! Also, WHO NEEDS THE LAW when you have VENGEANCE? The correct answer is NO ONE. The law is useless. 

But VOM. Mako and Hoe cake are, like, stronger than ever. Seriously gagging over here. At least everyone is going to live on Air Bender Island with Korra, so that should make for some great drama and will hopefully provide ample opportunities for awkward encounters between Korra and Mako. But I’m intrigued: all those benders–and the Avatar–in one place. Seems like a HUGE target to me.  

The Last Word: So THIS EPISODE. I think it was the best one yet. SO MUCH happened. GAHH! It was nonstop action, and I LOVED it. The plot was advanced big time. The drama and jeopardy was top notch. And the conclusion was just the bomb. I’m seriously jonesing to see Beifong get revenge on Amon and rescue her benders, but I’m worried because now I feel like Tarlock is totally going to take her position and that gives me NAUSEA. 

The Lines: “Do you think your dad knows about this tunnel?”

“What a swell, scary factory you have under your huge mansion.”

Whew. That’s a lot. And I still feel like I’m missing things. But this should be enough to discuss! Hit the comments, friends!

Season 1, Episode 6

The Skinny: Korra, Bolin and Mako are ready to kick ass and take names in the Pro Bending Final against those HIDEOUS bending hipsters, the Wolf Bats, lead by he of the epic hair flip. (I seriously can’t remember his name. Only the hair.) OBVS there are shenanigans, Amon shows up in his FREAKY mask to ruin things, Mako is smoking hot, Bolin is lovable and hilarious, and Korra is BAMFy. 

Hair Flip = THIS loony toon.

The Setup: Last week was all “Republic City, 9021o.” Bolin decides that he wants to get all up in Korra’s biz, real PERSONAL-like, Korra realizes that Bolin is a SUPER awesome friend–as evidenced by their frat-party dinner date where they laughed and belched over noodles together–but she’s definitely got a THANG for Mako (GET IN LINE, SISTER FRIEND). Too bad for Korra that Mako and Hoe Cake are totally still together. BLAH. But what’s this? When Bolin broaches the topic of Korra as gf to Mako, and then proceeds to take her out, Mako gets a bit JEALOUS, y’all. And also confused about his feelings, because, all evidence to the contrary, he thinks Hoe Cake is something special. So leave it to our girl Korra to take the bull by the horns, confess her feelings to Mako, and go in for the smooch. BOOM. HE DIGS IT *fist pump*. But basically this puts a big, weird cramp on the Fire Ferrets chemistry as a team because Bolin still thinks Korra is the bees knees. They need to mend fences ASAP, though, because they are going up against the hipster benders, the Wolf Bats (THAT NAME. I don’t even know. Are Wolf Bats a thing? Like, howling, flying…rodents?), in the pro bending final. How did they get to the final, you ask? WELL. Korra opens one of the many cans of whoop-ass that she keeps hidden in her huge pants and wins it for the team. Korra, Mako, and Bolin decide to cool it with the kissy face business because they have some crazy hair-flipping dude to deal with in the final. ONTO THE NEXT ONE, FOLKS. 

The Breakdown: Things open up with a Fire Ferrets training session underway. Mako, Korra, and Bolin are gearing up to face the Wolf Bats in the Pro Bending Final by aiming their fire/water/earth at pictures of the Hair Flip. Korra’s feeling good about their chances even though they’re the underdogs. Just as she andthe boys are about to get really psyched up, though, their radio cuts out and Amon comes on and brings the cray cray. He says that everyone should enjoy the Pro Bending Final because–GASP!–he thinks Republic City should stop glorifying benders, and so wants the council to shut down the arena and cancel the finals. Then he brings the threats, saying there will be “severe consequences” if they don’t. Stunned faces all around.

Korra and the boys take this news and run to the council, where Tenzin, Tarlok, and the three mute members who only ever raise their hands while seated, tell them that they have caved to Amon’s threats and are going to cancel the final and stop pro bending FOREVAH. The Fire Ferrets are AGHAST, and Korra advocates keeping the finals on as scheduled because caving means that Amon wins. And we all know he MUST LOSE. While arguing their case, Chief Beifong shows up and surprisingly agrees with Korra. She thinks the benders need to stick up to the Equalists, and assures the council that her force of metal benders will have the arena locked up tighter than Fort Knox. Chi blockers can’t hurt metal benders, Beifong says. Then, Tarlock and his sneaky ass basically get Beifong to take personal responsibility for all the spectators. (DUN DUN DUNNNN!) So the council caves AGAIN, this time to the Fire Ferrets and Chief Beifong, and the Pro Bending Finals are a GO. Of course, they don’t realize at the time that Amon WANTED them to do this exact thing, so freaky face is all excited, although you would never know it because his only facial expression is over-botoxed blankness, what with the mask and all.

Apparently, Tenzin got the same vibes from Tarlock as I did because he warns Beifong that Tarlock is setting her up/being an asshat. Bei Fong is all, “bish please! I don’t need no babysitter!” Tenzin says he’s going to stay close to Beifong during the match anyway just in case. Korra butts in, Beifong makes tracks the minute Korra shows up to make nice, and THEN! Korra eventually realizes that the reason Beifong is basically a tightly wound ball of MEAN is because SHE used to be with Tenzin. Y’all, Beifong is a JILTED LOVER. SIGH. Even the adults bring the dramz. 

So, THE FINAL. FIRE FERRETS. WOLF BATS. I should have known it would end in disaster when Mako and Hoe Cake blew kisses to each other (UGH/GAG/VOM) before the match started. Hoe Cake is bad luck and I want her GONE, please and thank you. I prefer to remember Mako like THIS instead:

Lookin’ FINE, Mako. Lookin’ fine.

Anyway, the match is a doozy, but CLEARLY fixed from the first whistle. Hair Flip is a MAD CHEATER, guys. The Wolf Bats are pulling all kinds of illegal moves and the ref is, like, too busy counting his money to call any fouls. RIDICULOUS. Even though the Fire Ferrets bring it, and Korra is FILTHY, they are no match for the Wolf Bats’ dirty game. 

So, Hair Flip and his dirty, cheating cronies win the Pro Bending final. ALAS. But after the Wolf Bats are crowned champs, Amon makes good on his threats to drop the hammer on benders and people who support them. Remember how Chief Beifong was all, “my metal benders can take those wussy chi blockers any day, twice on Sunday?” Yeah, well, Amon’s soldiers, who have scattered themselves among the crowd, are sporting these electrical thingies in their hands, and they use them to shock Beifong and her crew out. PANIC!! MASS HYSTERIA!

And while this is going on, HOLY CRAP, Amon shows up in the ring and EFFING TAKES AWAY HAIR FLIP’S BENDING. He takes it all from ALL the Wolf Bats. BOOM! Amon then gets preachy about equality and how benders are THE WORST. But check it: While the Fire Ferrets are stuck tied to a pole underneath the ring, Amon is speachifying about how a new Equalist government will soon be in place in Republic City and how those electrical thingies are basically devices that allow ANYONE to possess the power of the chi blockers. GULP. Bigger gulp? Amon doesn’t just have his sights set on equalizing Republic City. He wants to eradicate bending from THE WHOLE WORLD. Dang. 

So, Korra finally gets free and goes after Amon and his cronies. Awesome bending is awesome, and Korra kills it, with some more help from Chief Beifong, her new bestie. They fight together, but of course, Amon gets away in his crazy zeppelin or whatever AIRSHIP of evil he flies around in and lives to flash his freaky face another day. 

The Last Word: I liked Korra teaming up with Chief Beifong, friends. I love how Beifong is a BADASS and Korra is a BADASS and they both have such strong personalities. They have so much more in common than they realize at first. Can’t wait to see how their relationship grows–or not–in the future. And also, Amon is NASTY. Like Tenzin said, “Republic City is at war.” Shizz is about to get REAL. I feel like Amon has moles everywhere and I’m suspicious of lots of people. (ahemTarlockcoughHoeCake’sDaddycoughahem). 

The Lines: “I am currently wetting my pants.” 

So, what did you guys think? How much did you throw up in your mouths when Mako and Hoe Cake were blowing kisses at each other? Do you think anything is going to come of all the reminiscing Tenzin and Bei Fong are getting up to? Maybe she won’t be so prickly or nasty to Korra anymore. And honestly: WHAT is up with Amon taking away bending abilities?! And where is he getting those chi blocker gloves?? (I have a theory about this last one, but since it’s probably hugely wrong, I might keep it to myself for now.)

Also, I have to give BIG hugs and props to Lisa from Lisa is Busy Nerding for doing such an ace job with these recaps. I’ve got BIG BIG shoes to fill! I hope I’m doing you proud, Lisa!!